(2025-10-02) Thousand Needles: Deal or No Deal?
Details
Author: Alli
Summary: Cerethan, Glyphe, Kalhidai, Lihua, Natlee, and Slicket take on a new mission at the Speedbarge -- negotiating for the oil (not the kind you cook with) in the ground under the new Splithoof centaur settlement, since the flood. ~5400 words
Rating: T for Teen
Cerethan Glyphe Tinkerspell Lihua Lightseason Natlee Spatterspark Slicket Throttleblast

Slicket stretches his little arms and yawns as he comes out of the Speedbarge's inn and looks around for the others.

Glyphe comes out of the outhouse and excuses herself past the long line. "Sorry. Sorry. Excuse me."

"Glyphe, over here," Slicket waves. "Fizzle's got a new mission for us, I got word."

"Does this one involve ice cream?" Lihua looks hopeful.

Glyphe toddles over happily. "Great! Is it another food-related mission? I'm starting to like those."
Glyphe giggles at Lihua.

Lihua nods emphatically at Glyphe.

"Not sure," Slicket squints his eyes. "He said something about centaurs, and I don't think they have that kind of technology."

Cerethan comes out of the inn. "A new mission, I heard? I'd be delighted to join in, as long as they don't involve ice creams again."

Lihua gasps at Cerethan.

"That's great," Slicket nods. "No matter what the mission is, some of us will be happy."

Slicket heads towards the ramp, and sees Lhilhi and Finder on the way. "Oh, hey! Join us? We're just heading up to Fizzle for the next mission."

[Glyphe]: Hi Kalhidai! Hi Finder!

[Kalhidai]: Hi!

Glyphe waves Kalhidai over. "C'mon, we're gonna get another mission!"

"But it is not an ice cream mission," Lihua explains. "It is a scent ore mission."

Fizzle Brassbolts looks at the team and waves. "Cobalts, great job defending the Speedbarge! I've got something else that I need you to help out with, and it might be a chance for a nice profit for you."

"Profit sounds great, what did you have in mind?" Slicket asks.

"I've sent Crazzle Sprysprocket and Kravel Koalbeard to negotiate with the centaur survivors!" Fizzle says, and then pauses, and backs up to explain why. "Their Splithoof Heights is dripping with oil!"

Glyphe wrinkles her nose. "Sounds gross," she says.

Natlee hurries in. "OMT, sorry, I could not get my hair to behave."

Slicket gives her a thumbs up, checking that her hair looks alright now.

"Pardon me if I'm wrong," Cerethan asks, rubbing his chinless beard. "But centaurs were the enemies of the taurens, were they not?"

Natlee's hair looks amazing.

"Not that I'm suggesting we let them die!" Cerethan's eyes widen. "I'm just trying to make sure I get the right idea of who we're trying to save, that is all."

"Oh, uh, I didn't mean exactly literally. It's in the ground, still," Fizzle explains, and then nods to the approaching Natlee. "But anyway, they have no use for it, and we definitely do. And yeah, sure, they’re traditional tauren enemies. I’m not a tauren though."

Lihua furrows her brow, confused. "The oil is in the ground?"

"Yeah it's like a… fuel," Natlee explains. "It's all gooey and underground and you have to pump it out."

[Kalhidai]: "Goo?"

"It's what makes this place run!" Slicket says, gesturing around at the moving parts of the barge.

"Why would they put it underground?" Lihua scratches her head. "I keep all my oil in sealed containers until I need it."

"We're not saving or killing anyone, at least not yet," Fizzle says, gesturing like Cerethan is an excitable animal that may need calming. "Just trying to make a deal. Crazzle and Kravel are doing their best, I'm sure, but I'd feel better if you all took charge of the negotiations."

Glyphe perks up. "I've never negotiated before, but I know Cobalt does it a lot. We negotiate the fel out of things!"

"Negotiations?" Natlee looks around at the gathered crowd. "Uhhh maybe I better handle this one."

"So we will handle negotiations with warmongering individuals?" Cerethan tilts his head. He looks at a nearby goblin. "Hm."

"Excellent! Except maybe we can negotiate the oil out of these ones," Fizzles nods. "I don't know how to use fel as barge fuel."

Glyphe nods too, because she totally understands what Fizzle is talking about.

"Let me," Natlee says. "I can like, sell ice to a tuskarr."

Glyphe smiles at Natlee. Of course she knows how; she knows everything.

[Kalhidai]: "Fel is not good for you. Do not eat it."

"Noted," Slicket says. "Always good to keep that straight."

"They're on the bluff to the northeast," Fizzle says. "Make sure you find Crazzle before you head in to talk."

The team heads on their way down to the dock.

[Natlee]: "Like, seriously? You guys should totally let me do the talking to the centaurs, okay? They will stomp most of you to death three words in, swear to the Light."

"Yeah, babe, I'm used to letting other people do the talking," Slicket says. "I'll be here with the muscle to back us up in case things go badly.

[Kalhidai]: "They could not. I am quite tall."

Natlee giggles at Lhilhi.
"True," Natlee says. "They would try to stomp you and end up looking very silly."

[Kalhidai]: "And then they would have their big hoof up too high so I could grab it and whoops!"

Natlee giggles at Lhilhi again.

"My status as an affluent Highborne may be of interest in negotiations as well," Cerethan stands proudly. "I'm certain you commoners were more than happy to have a noble by your side!"

"Right, yeah, nobles are good allies, and draenei and mages," Slicket nods. "Really, how could they say no to all of us?"

[Natlee]: "OMT Cerethan PLEASE I am begging you not to say one word around the centaurs."

"… right, I understand," Cerethan clears his throat. "I will do my utmost best to make sure I don't say a word to the centaurs."

"And Lihua, I'm guessing this isn't food grade oil," Slicket says apologetically. "If I'm wrong though, I'm sure you'll be able to tell."

"You'd better stand by for some centaur wrestling," Natlee says to Lhilhi, "because I feel pretty sure these guys are gonna try and talk."

[Kalhidai]: "But I will begin in a friendly manner. There may be no need for whoops."

Slicket heads down and hops into the familiar team riverboat. He hits the horn a few times.

The team boat heads up to the centaur camp.

Slicket peers up at a rotating light near the coast at Splithoof Heights. "That looks like a gnomish camp alright. Ah, and a Gnomeregan banner," Slicket nods. "Must be our guy."

Glyphe points. "And a gnome."

Natlee gives Crazzle a cute little wave.

Crazzle waves. "Hey, hey! Are you reinforcements?"

[Natlee]: "We totally are! What's up?"

"You all look amazingly competent," Crazzle says, and he's looking at Natlee's hair when he says it. "I've got Kravel Koalbeard up there talking to one of their chiefs, but now that you're here, we'll have the rights to pump up their oil in no time!"

"What seems to be the hold-up?" Slicket asks. "Seems like a pretty straightforward deal, isn't it?"

"Just to know which kind of centaurs we're dealing with," Cerethan says. "Have they tried to maim you?"

"Uh, not yet," Crazzle says, eyeing Cerethan oddly. "It's not going that badly."

[Natlee]: "So um, I have like, a ton of experience talking to really really unfriendly warlords and stuff? You have to like, strike just the right balance between being super mean but also respectful."

"Sounds great, but… I should tell you there’s a factor we didn’t include in our calculations – the Horde," Crazzle sighs. "They’ve got somebody up there trying to win the centaur over to their side."

Glyphe frowns. "Yeah, well… We've got Natlee and we're way cuter than the Horde."

"Ugggggggggggggh," Natlee groans. She mumbles under her breath about the Horde. There are definitely at least two gnomish curse words in there.

"That's one thing, but If we're going to get those oil drilling rights, we need to know what the Horde is offering. How can we win if we don't do them one better?!" Crazzle says.

"Oooh…I wonder if they have any pandaren with them," Lihua considers aloud.

"You're absolutely right," Natlee agrees. "I wonder if I can sniff out the Horde's deal?"

"Think you could talk to a pandaren if they’ve got one, and get that info for us?" Slicket asks, looking to Lihua.

“Ooooh," says Natlee.

Lihua nods to Slicket, "I could try."

"One of you should do that," Crazzle nods. "Their negotiator, Trackmaster Zherin, is up there waiting to talk to one of their khans right now. Why don't you head up and persuade him to hand over the Horde's proposal?"

Slicket cracks his knuckles and nods.

"Wait, just like, ask the Horde guy for it? I'm not sure that's gonna work." Natlee frowns.

"That sounds very easily done," Cerethan says. He's sweating, and not from the heat.

"You can ask… persuasively…" Crazzle suggests, glancing at various weapons. "Just, you know, don't kill the guy. We don't want to start something."

"Trackmaster Zherin, you said his name was?" Natlee makes a little note on her hand.

"Yep, Zherin," Crazzle nods.

Lihua, still confused, pipes up, "So…if it is underground…does the oil come from the scent ore?"

Cerethan looks at Lihua, utterly confused.

Natlee stares at Lihua also.

Lihua smiles back at the stares, waiting patiently for an explanation.

"I uh… think the centaur just happened to end up in a place where there's oil underground," Slicket offers, completely missing ‘scent ore’.

"The oil comes from underground," Natlee says slowly, as though to a child.

Lihua sighs, still baffled.

"Okay, so a plan," Slicket says, stepping away to talk to the team. "Zherin's not just going to hand over the Horde's proposal."

Glyphe tries to crack her knuckles like Slicket does. It doesn't really work. "Ow. I mean, we could just beat him up. He's horde, after all."

Natlee considers. "I mean, is this Zherin a goblin? If not, I doubt Slicket could beat him up."

“We should at least try to talk before resorting to beating up," Lihua says softly.

"But," Natlee says, "centaurs actually do totally respect brute force? So it might impress them if we could."

Cerethan looks at Glyphe trying to crack her knuckles.

"No idea," Slicket shrugs. "Could be a tauren or an orc, for all I know. They're big. So we could try that. Or if we want to be sly about it… any of you good at pickpocketing?"

"However," Natlee says, "not to keep arguing with myself, but I doubt any of our ability to beat up like, a Tauren or orc, yeah."

[Kalhidai]: "We could distract him and steal it?"

"Let's try that!" Slicket straightens. "Who wants to be the distraction, and who the thief?"

"I would not debase myself to a practice as abject as pickpocketing," Cerethan shakes his head. "I have standards."

Natlee nods toward Lhilhi. "That seems like the best plan to me, yeah."

Glyphe's nose wrinkles. "We beat up Tauren attacking the elves before. We can take down any ol' orc or tauren together. But okay, we can try to pickpocket stuff I guess. Then if it doesn't work, explosions!"

"I am super good at both distracting and pickpocketing, as it happens," Natlee says with a little toss of one pigtail with her hand.

"There is a difference between killing Tauren and just like, beating them up," Natlee says solemnly. "I can kill a Tauren," she says, "but not beat one up."

"Maybe he'd be super distracted if we all turned up to talk to him," Slicket suggests. "And then you could see if he's got anything written. If not, we try to beat him up."

Natlee gives Slicket a sassy little salute.

"Oh, very clever! If we all question him at the same time, he will be overwhelmed and will not notice Natlee stealing from him." Lihua gives a little clap.

Natlee beams at Lihua.

Glyphe eyes the robot wandering around. "That thing needs a serious tune-up," she mumbles.

Natlee giggles at Glyphe.

"If I were to steal anything, I would do it properly with a complicated heist, or through simple yet meticulous methods, as one should," Cerethan crosses his arms.

“This seems simple and meticulous to me," Slicket says with a grin. "Let's try it. And Cerethan, if Plan A and Plan B don't work, we can go for Plan C which is… you can noble at him."

Cerethan smiles proudly. "You shall see, nobling will be the most efficient method in the end!"

Slicket eyes a centaur guard as they pass, but they don’t attack the team.

Lihua gawks at the centaurs. "What are those?"

"Centaurs!" Slicket says to Lihua with a grin.

"Scent-…oooooh," Lihua's fur ripples in a blush, realizing her mistake.

Natlee's eyes widen when she sees that it is the worst of all possible beatup possibilities. There's a tauren in the camp, who seems very likely to be the Zherin they're after.

"Okay, here he is…. Plan A… go!" Slicket whispers.

Natlee Fades.

"Yo, Zherin!" Slicket calls. "We want to talk to you about your proposal for the centaur."

[Kalhidai]: "Where do you buy your shoes? They look really sturdy."

"Ahem," Glyphe says. "I like your… um… braids? I guess? Hi! I've never talked to a Tauren before. Do you speak Common?"

[Kalhidai]: "One hoofer to another, c'mon."

"Hello, Zherin!" Lihua smiles brightly. "I would like to ask you about tauren cuisine! What is your favorite dish?"

While Kahlidai chats up the tauren, Natlee deftly slips her fingers into various of his pouches and pockets, swift as a hummingbird.

Zherin turns to look at the Alliance team addressing him, and frowns. "My shoes would not fit your feet, little draenei. I do speak Common, but… um…"

Zherin is confused by all the questions, and looks from one to the other.

"Greetings, tauren!" Cerethan says. "Hm…" he searches for something to say that would distract the tauren. "If you were to have a baby with… the Khan right there, would it be centauren, or a taurentaur?"

[Kalhidai]: "Taurentaur sounds better."

Glyphe blinks at Cerethan. "Like the front half a tauren and the back half a centaur? Or the other way around? And how would you be able to tell?"

Cerethan blinks back at Glyphe. "I have no idea, I panicked," he whispers.

"A baby with the Khan… cuisine… braids…" Zherin is at a loss for words. "What is this? You are just trying to hassle me while I am doing business."

Natlee backs up a few steps unfolding something, and then she bounces up and down excitedly, gesturing wildly with big eyes and a sort of urgent grimace.

[Kalhidai]: "Mr. Zherin, did you know that green is my favorite color? I think it's better than blue and yellow put together!"

"Oh yes, then we would need to know about centaur cuisine as well," Lihua adds. "To make sure the baby gets proper nutrition!"

"Baby cuisine…" Zherin blinks. "Pandaren, maybe we can speak later, after my audience with the khan."

Natlee makes several more urgent gestures, backing out of the tent.

"WELL! I think we probably should stop bothering Mr. Zherin here," Slicket says, jerking his head towards the entrance of the tent.

Glyphe sees Natlee back away. "Well geeze, ok, no need to be unfriendly we'll just go."

[Kalhidai]: "You have to tell me a joke now. That's the rules!"

Lihua bows respectfully to Zherin. "I would very much like that. Thank you!"

Natlee excitedly waves a paper like it's a signal flag.

Zherin looks confused as they all leave, and then shakes his head. Alliance.

Natlee stage-whispers, "I have some good news and some REALLY bad news."

"What is it?" Slicket stage-whispers back.

Skycaller Vrakthris, an elderly tauren, eyes the team as they exit the tent.

"Okay so the GOOD news," Natlee begins, "is that he did write down the deal the Horde is making. The bad news is, it is… like so much gold."

Glyphe's shoulders slump. "Maybe we can try trading for ice cream?"

"How much?" Cerethan asks, unimpressed.

Natlee names a sum that the six of them could not possibly come up with if they had a month.

[Kalhidai]: "Ice cream would be better."

"Yikes," Slicket winces. "I'm sure the Speedbarge took a big hit after the flood, they probably can't field much. We'll have to see what Crazzle's got to offer."

"Let's hope he's secretly the heir to a vast fortune," Natlee says.

"… that is a large sum of money, yes," Cerethan says. "Although the Starflight used to be richer than any of you could ever dream to be… we were sent in exile. That impacts finances."

Skycaller Vrakthis clears his throat. "Strangers in my camp. A word."

"Greetings!" Natlee says, suddenly pitching her voice almost an octave lower.

"What do we have here? A pandaren, a night elf, a draenei, and gnomes? Come to steal our goods with your honeyed tongue and promises?" Vrakthris says critically.

Glyphe eyes Natlee but assumes there's a reason for it. She follows suit. "No, we don't have any honey."

"My tongue is honeyed, it's true," Natlee says in the same deep(ish) voice, "But we steal nothing! We are honorable."

"Mmm…honey on my tongue…" Lihua licks her lips.

Vrakthis narrows his eyes at them. "You do not fool me. I have lived a long time, and I know what dealing with your kind means. Perhaps not pandaren, who I am meeting for the first time, but the rest of you."

Natlee frowns. Oh, he's met her, it seems.

"We have come to offer fair trade, not to steal…from you," Lihua explains.

"If that is the case, and you would like to win my regard, then I have something to ask of you," Vrakthis says. "Do this, and I may lend my voice to your proposal, as an elder."

"Sure, pops," Slicket says. "What do you want us to do?"

"Just try us!" Glyphe says in her normal voice. Then she clears her throat and says, in a deeper voice, "Just try us."

"You must be thinking of the lowborne," Cerethan approaches bowing. "But I am one of the Highborne, much more respectful than the lower class, prancing in the grass…" He looks around. "Although prancing in the grass is a respectful activity, I didn't mean to judge!"

Lihua nods. "How can we help?"

Natlee quietly facepalms at the entire clusterfork.

Vrakthis stares levelly at Cerethan for a moment, and then says, "Back when the waters rushed in, the great water spirit, Aquarian, doused the Ancient Brazier deep inside of Splithoof Hold. If you go that way, reignite the brazier and defeat Aquarian. From within him, you will reclaim the Sacred Flame. Bring it to me."

"Okay, defeating stuff, we can definitely do," Natlee says in her regular voice.

Glyphe nods. Ooo, sacred flame! Right up her alley.

"Yeah, sure, if we go that way, we'll get it," Slicket nods agreeably.

[Kalhidai]: "That actually sounds like fun!"

One mission complete and a new one picked up, the team heads back to report to Crazzle at his camp. I honestly have no idea where Kravel is, seeing as he was supposedly chatting with the centaur. Maybe he wandered off. Or maybe the Horde, being less skilled at con artistry, beat him up to take his proposal?

Crazzle looks up eagerly. "Do you have the Horde's proposal? What are they offering for the drilling rights?"

"I'll let one of you give him the bad news," Natlee says. Natlee is literally holding the bad news in her hand.

"Gold, and lots of it," Slicket says. He names the amount.

"What?! How'd they get that much gold to offer?" Crazzle clasps his hands together nervously. "We don't have that kind of money! Hm… Let me think…"

"We also got a task to do from this grumpy centaur. They might reduce their price if we do his task," Glyphe notes.

Natlee nods at Glyphe. "Totally a good point."

Glyphe beams.

Crazzle seems to be counting something in his mind, his fingers twitching, but then he shakes his head. "That could help, but even with a goodwill discount… we just DO NOT have the kind of gold that the Horde is offering. We have to do something or we're not going to be able to get those drilling rights!" Crazzle's eyes suddenly light up. "Wait a minute! I have an idea! There was this report from an underwater survey that we did right after the Cataclysm struck. Back in the old stomping grounds of the centaur, Splithoof Crag and Splithoof Hold, some new rare ore was pushed up from underground. Not elementium, but pyrite," Crazzle's eyes gleam.

"Oh hey, that's where Grumpy's brazier was, yeah?" Slicket says.

Natlee's eyes widen. She giggles.

"Indeed it was!" Cerethan nods.

[Natlee]: "And the Horde has NO idea? OMT, pyrite is way more valuable than gold."

"Two circuits one battery," Crazzle grins. "Yeah, you can get your goodwill, and we can dig our wealth to offer right out of the ground."

"Who needs a plan when the Light is on your side I guess," says Natlee, buffing her nails.

"Yeah, that's super lucky," Slicket nods. "So… we're on for Aquarian and some pyrite gathering?"

"We are so gonna win this," Natlee says.

"Sorry Lihua, I don't think any of this is edible," Slicket says apologetically. "But maybe that tauren will share recipes later."

Lihua nods excitedly. "Yes, I hope so!"

"Tauren cooking isn't actually bad, like, at all," Natlee says. "They use suuuuper fresh veggies and stuff, it's kind of amazing."

"Yeah, we had that sometimes at the Raceway," Slicket nods. "Very down to earth."

"Really? I've never tried any. How do you know?" Cerethan asks Natlee.

"I feel like it really cleanses you," Natlee says seriously. "Oh um, I've traveled a lot," she says vaguely.

"Do they use many spices?" Lihua inquires.

"We just had a lot of people come by the Raceway, different sorts," Slicket says. "Lotta food stands. And uh… more herbs?"

"Not really," says Natlee. "At least the family who was holding me h— that I was staying with didn't. But the veggies were so fresh they really almost didn't need it."

"Okay, I think the old centaur grounds are underwater here," Slicket says. "We'll have to swim."

Natlee's pigtails float like an angelic cloud around her underwater.

Lihua's fur floofs, making her look even softer.

Slicket fights fish bigger than he is while others collect the valuable ore.

Natlee points at an underwater brazier.

"That's gotta be it," Slicket burbles. "Glyphe, can you light it up?"

Natlee looks dubious about the underwater lighting scenario.

[Lihua]: "How can we light it underwater?"

Glyphe burbles back, "You bet. Stand back, I'm gonna try MAGIC!"

Natlee stands back.

Oh. Like that.

Cerethan looks at Glyphe. "Please do, I'd be curious to see how advanced gnomish magi actually i-" Cerethan gets pushed by Aquarian's waters.

"Magic, see?" Glyphe looks proud.

"I know who you are, Glyphe!" Aquarian shouts. "I'll not surrender the Sacred Flame to a filthy meatbag such as yourself!!"

Slicket whirls around in the water to defend Glyphe from the angry elemental.

[Glyphe]: "We've been swimming around, we're pretty clean meatbags, thank you."

Natlee giggles.

"Yeah, meatbag is not inaccurate, but I think we're pretty excellent meatbags," Slicket nods, after the elemental dies. "Glyphe, you can get the flame from him?"

Natlee lets Glyphe take care of the weird magic stuff.

Glyphe takes care of the weird magic stuff.

"That's goodwill and pyrite," Slicket burbles. "We can grab more pyrite on the way out."

The team gathers all the pyrite up and loads it onto the riverboat, then heads back towards the Splithoof Heights.

"We got it!" Natlee announces excitedly to Crazzle.

Crazzle looks at the approaching team and the valuable load of pyrite with excitement. "Genius! Sourcing our wealth right from the ground instead of our pockets. I bet they’ll love it. So much more valuable than gold."

"Now that the pyrite is gathered, I want you to take it up to Khan Ablinh. He'll be so surprised and overwhelmed, I bet he'll offer to help us setup the drilling rigs. We could use the horsepower." Crazzle grins. "Haha, get it? Horsepower?"

"Yeah, this knocks the Horde's offer right out of the water," Slicket nods. "Given the pricing on pyrite ore these days."

"Like I said… Light-blessed!" Natlee preens.

"We are on it, as the lowborne would say," Cerethan tries to crack his fingers, like Glyphe did while imitating Slicket. He fails, and chips one of his perfectly manicured, painted blue nails. He looks very sadly at it.

"Let's stop by Grumpy and get this offer in," Slicket says, and cracks his knuckles. It was popular, apparently.

Natlee notices the nail disaster. "Oh nooooo…" she says softly and sincerely.

The team heads back to the grumpy centaur.

"Dude, we got your Sacred Flame," Slicket says, very respectfully. He gestures to Glyphe.

Natlee does not greet the grumpy centaur skycaller.

Cerethan looks at Natlee. Someone understands him.

Glyphe holds out the flame, taken from a pocket. It's just there, burning in her hand like nbd.

"You did this favor to ingratiate yourself with me, but I will not sing your praises." Vrakthris says, narrowing his eyes again. He does that a lot. He reaches out to take the flame. "I know what is to come. Where the sea failed, the great air spirit will strike you and your people down for your many transgressions against the elements. Begone from my sight!"

He’s not talking about Al’Akir, by the way. He’s talking about Whrrrl, air elemental leader of the Splithoof centaur. We’re not going to murder Whrrrl or anything. Who would do that?

"Rude," Slicket mutters.

Natlee makes exaggerated 'blah blah blah' faces behind the centaur's back.

"Well, so much for that," Slicket says. "Let's get this pyrite to the khan."

Natlee beams!

"Natlee, you want to present the offer?" Slicket suggests.

The team approaches the khan.

"Oh powerful khan!" Natlee greets him. "We come before you with a gift worthy of your magnificence!"

Khan Ablinh looks over with suspicious eyes. "What gift? More gold than the Horde?"

"Even better! Behold!" She gestures toward their offering.

"I am NOT stupid!" Ablinh says, sticking out his lower lip. "This is not gold at all!"

Cerethan is in the way, hiding the pyrite. He moves over.

"Well" Natlee blinks. "Of course not, it's"

"NOT GOLD!" Ablinh roars. "Go back to your master and tell him that there will be NO deal! That is, if you can survive to make it back to him."

"Survive…?" Lihua's eyes widen.

Natlee squeaks and flees.

"No, dude, this was…" Slicket follows the others.

"Stupid centaurs!" Natlee sobs as she runs for it. "Did no one show them the current market price of pyrite???"

"He barely even looked at it!" Slicket is stricken. "How could he have such poor business sense!"

Glyphe looks around. "They all look mad now."

"We meant no harm!" Lihua protests.

"We had the better offer," Slicket says, like this will change the outcome.

"Do you want me to go back to explain the true value of Pyrite?" Cerethan asks the others as they flee the camp.

"They're not listening now, Cerethan," Slicket says glumly.

Natlee shrieks as one of the centaurs attacks.

Natlee continues weeping. "I should have explaaaaaaaaained first… *sob* "OMT, I screwed the pooch SO bad…" Natlee pulls at her pigtails.

Earnestly, Glyphe says, "Don't cry Natlee! It's not your fault he's stupid!"

Lihua pouts sympathetically at Natlee. "Your heart was pure."

Natlee carefully dabs at her eyes, trying to keep her eyeliner intact.

"Crazzle, they didn't recognize the pyrite," Slicket says, with a deep sigh.

"WHAT!? Why would they turn this down? And then attack us?! Ugh, centaurs." Crazzle shakes his head. "Yeah, you couldn't have known he'd be that stoneheaded about it."

"What now?" Slicket asks, bereft.

"They've spit in our faces. We made them a generous offer and they made the mistake of not accepting. Now we… you… will show them the error of their ways." Crazzle advises. "I'm not leaving here empty-handed! Are you?"

Cerethan looks at his hand. "Perhaps the nail incident was an omen of our endeavor's futility…" he whispers.

"But they turned us down…" Slicket says.

"They also ATTACKED us and didn't even let me FINISH!" Natlee huffs.

"Our move then… I'll bet you were wondering what's in the giant crate. Well, wait no longer. I want you to take up one of our drilling rigs to the oil pools and pump us some crude," Crazzle says. "Of course, you should expect the centaur to attack. Just defend the drill long enough for us to get a barrel or two out of the ground. You can leave them the pyrite — someday they'll find out how valuable it is."

Glyphe eyes the crate. "It's awfully big to sneak past them."

"You want us to steal the oil?" Lihua frowns uncertainly.

Slicket looks at the others. "What do you think? It wouldn't exactly be stealing. We'd be paying them more than its worth, even if they didn't recognize it."

"Well if we don't take it, the Horde gets it. And you know what they're gonna do with it?" Natlee pauses, in case Lihua knows.

Lihua shrugs at Natlee. "I do not know."

"They're gonna use it to fuel their freakin AIRSHIPS, like the one they used to BOMB THERAMORE." Natlee starts crying again.

"Ohh, Nat," Slicket says, his face falling. "We can't let them do that."

"That is… a good argument, coming from you," Cerethan nods. He looks at the crying gnome. "Not coming from you-coming from you. I don't even know why I phrased it this way!"

"Besides, it's not like they're using it," Glyphe says.

"Yeah, they just live here," Slicket says, looking up at the angry centaur camp.

Natlee nods and sniffles, once again doing an amazing job of dabbing at her eyes without disturbing her makeup.

"So we do it?" Slicket says, looking around to look for dissent. "Only fight in defense, and we leave them the pyrite."

Lihua sighs and gives a reluctant nod. "When you say it like this, I suppose we must."

[Natlee]: "We don't have to like, START a fight, but if they want to try to kill us for taking fuel from the Horde then like, I am happy to finish that fight, you know?"

"Yeah, we leave them the pyrite. They'll figure out eventually how much it's worth." Glyphe nods.

[Kalhidai]: "I didn't consider what the horde would do if they gained the oil. We must not let them have it."

Natlee nods. "We TRIED. An attempt was made."

"Let's get to it, then," Slicket says. "I hope they don't attack too much."

Slicket deploys his drill and takes up a defensive position. Some centaur attack, but fewer than the team might have feared. Natlee keeps everyone shielded and healed.

Slicket carries off a barrel of oil. "I hope we can get on better terms with them someday. Maybe like wait a day, and you can try to explain the pyrite thing again, Nat?"

"That could have gone waaaay worse," Natlee says. "Yeah, I'll… send a note, at least."

They make it back to Crazzle’s camp.

"Oil! Black Gold! Tanaris Tea! This’ll keep the Speedbarge running indefinitely," Crazzle beams.

"Not literally tea," Cerethan says, tilting his head towards Lihua.

"Yeah um, do NOT drink." Natlee adds gravely.

Lihua closes her opened mouth when Cerethan explains.

Natlee giggles.

"Uh, yeah, only machines drink it," Slicket says with a chuckle. "Maybe next time, more ice cream."

"Glad we could help," Slicket says. "And I hope this doesn't mean bad centaur relations forever."

The team heads back to the shore.

"Let's head back to the Speedbarge, yeah?" Slicket says, hopping in the riverboat. "We can report to Fizzle and get cleaned up from the oil."

"Whatever," says Natlee with a sigh.

"A brilliant idea! I would not say no to a relaxing bath," Cerethan beams.

"Do you like bubbles in your bath?" Natlee asks. "I have a few kinds."

"A private relaxing bath," he specifies. "I don't wish to share one single bath for all of us, of course."

"What kind of bubbles?" Cerethan asks.

"For you I'm thinking maybe the iris and violet bubbles," Natlee says thoughtfully, gazing at Cerethan.

With that happy thought, the boat steams its way back towards the Speedbarge.

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