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| Details |
| Author: | Saaron |
| Summary: | The girls of the Kajaro Trading Company and the company's spiritual advisor celebrate their raise by "motivating" their "workers" and get plenty of gifts! And bad news. |
| Rating: | T for Teen |
In the HQ for the Kajaro Trading Company.
Mikzi lurks against the wall with her arms folded.
Jixxi sidles in with her nose in a book, and a half-formed fireball in her other hand.
"Heyyy. Watch ya fire there, sweetheart," Miksi says to the mage.
"Mmm?" Jixxi tucks the book under one arm. She's still holding the fireball. "Did you just call me hot?"
"I didn't NOT do that," says Mikzi, deadpan.
"Gotcha, just asking, cause otherwise I might hafta go to HR," Jixxi says with a laugh, extinguishing the fire.
Oktavi skips into the Kajaro Trading Company's main building, happily humming the company's jingle.
"Oh, you're a funny one, are ya?" says Mikzi. Her tone could be flirtatious or threatening, it's hard to tell. Maybe both.
"Aww, were you girls waiting for me?" Oktavi says, as if suddenly noticing the others. "I didn't miss anything important, right?" She clasps her hands together under her chin.
"Nah, if anything important happened, you woulda heard it," Jixxi says, grinning at Oktavi.
"Teehee, okay!" She turns to Mikzi. "Good because Sassy is kinda staring daggers at me right now for being just a tiny little bit late," she whispers.
Jixxi raises an eyebrow. "You know time is money, friend."
"Blessed riches, sisters!" Wikkit approaches, arms wide.
Mikzi glances skyward. Not religiously.
"High Investor! A pleasure to see you here! Come join us, I'm sure Sassy will be happy to see you too!" Oktavi gestures forward to everyone.
Wikkit smiles and cups her hands together in a "receiving money" gesture.
“Finally!” Sassy whispers, before going back to her normal volume, which is loud. “Hey there, you all. I trust that you're enjoying your new raises, as one of the top companies on the island?”
"You better be," Mikzi says with quiet menace.
Sassy immediately puts a coin in Wikkit's hand. "Thank you so very much for being here, High Investor."
Wikkit clasps the coin in her hand, bowing to Sassy. "May Our Lady of Prosperity smile upon you and your fortunes!"
"I'm always a fan of raises," Jixxi says with a smile. "Spell components don't come cheap."
"Raises are great! But you know," Oktavi twirls her hair with her finger. "I'm not doing this for the money, but for the people."
Sassy bows to Wikkit, before turning to look at everyone again. "We all think that one of you’s going to be the one to finally replace that stinky ol' Gallywix and take the title of Trade Princess. But you didn't hear that from me!"
Jixxi takes out a coin, and for a moment it might look like she's going to give it to Wikkit. Then she flicks it into the air, where it spins end over end, and then vanishes. Better luck next time Wikkit.
Wikkit watches the coin, and sighs softly, speaking a quiet prayer for Jixxi.
"But we have a lot to do and very little time. Hope you're ready!" Sassy says, raising a finger in the air.
"First on our list…" Sassy pulls out a very real list. "With all of the troubles down in the Kaja'mine, Foreman Dampwick's been going crazy trying to find you. He said something about some 'defiant trolls'."
"Oh yeah?" says Mikzi, raising a ruddy brow.
“The Kaja'mite that our trolls are mining is critical in the creation of Kaja'Cola. That bubbly stuff is making us a fortune, and it's going to get you that promotion to Trade Princess!” Her gaze is very vague when saying that ‘you’.
Jixxi rolls her eyes. "Ugh, trolls. I always try to ignore them, but you know… it can be hard sometimes."
"The Glittering Light will surely guide our future Trade Princess to success!" Wikkit puts her hand over her heart like she's said something profound.
"I'm happy to do a motivational seminar, if ya know what I mean," says Mikzi, smacking her fist into her palm in case you don't know what she means.
"I've always found a little arcane barrage can be just the thing a person needs to feel motivated," Jixxi nods in agreement.
"We have to get production flowing again. You'll find the foreman to the east. Here, give him this as an incentive to get his act together." She hands a gift box to Mikzi. "Here's your motivational seminar, as you so perfectly put it!"
"Atta girl," Mikzi agrees.
"Nice," Mikzi says to Sassy.
"As spokeswoman, it’s my duty to make sure everyone knows that our slaves are working in the best and most efficient conditions! I won’t have it any other way. Let’s go!" Oktavi says.
They go to Foreman Dampwick, who’s standing on a crate, overlooking the mines.
"You." Oktavi says, staring at Foreman Dampwick.
Jixxi casually tosses a little marble-sized fire from one hand to the other.
"Yo, Foreman," says Mikzi. No follow-up.
"Hey there. This batch of troll slaves has got to be the worst yet! Lucky for us that the kaja'mite doesn't seem to be making their soft brains any smarter, eh?" Foreman Dampwick says. "What's that fire for?" he suddenly asks.
"Motivation," answers Mikzi.
Jixxi grins.
Oktavi softens up. “We’ve noticed you’re… struggling with production. Is everything okay?”
"Um… everything's going great. Yeah," he says. "What's that?" he points at the gift box.
"More motivation," says Mikzi.
"… Y'know, I don't like the mix of fire and gifts as motivation…" Dampwick says. "But I can't resist a nicely wrapped gift like that! Gimme that!"
Dampwick opens up the gift, and the bomb explodes! "OUCH!" He wipes his hand on his burned beard hair. "Okay, okay! I got the message."
Mikzi cackles maniacally at Foreman Dampwick.
Jixxi giggles, letting her fire vanish. The explosions are already covered today.
"It is best not to let one's own performance impact the company's revenue. To hurt profits is to defy the natural order of the universe." WIkkit offers this 'advice' in a gentle and compassionate tone.
Mikzi glances toward heaven again. Must be praying.
"What she said!" Oktavi points at Wikkit. "What's really happening, then?"
"Kaja'mite mining is down, which is negatively impacting our production of Kaja'Cola!" he simply explains.
"Yeah, yeah, we heard," says Mikzi.
"Yeah, okay, but why?" Jixxi asks. "We're fixers. Tell us what to fix."
"We’re very well aware, silly! So, what solutions have you put in place?" Oktavi asks.
"I tried calling the exterminator, but he's fled with the last payment we made to him," he says. "Do you think you could head into the three mines and take care of it? I'd help but I still haven't attended the cartel-mandated fighter training seminar."
"Tee! Classic exterminator," Oktavi chuckles.
"You want I should motivate the trolls a little?" Mikzi offers. "Such that they perhaps fear for their lives if they don't work a little harder, maybe?"
Jixxi rolls her eyes again. "You do know you can just nap through the seminar, yeah? No use avoiding it…"
Dampwick looks hopefully at Mikzi. "I've failed to do that! I tried the best I could to meet our Kaja'Cola quotas, but you know troll slaves these days. Good help is hard to find!"
Oktavi snickers. “You have no idea!”
"Leave it ta me," says Mikzi confidently.
"Surely we can do this! Sisters, can you feel the gold slipping through your fingers? The coins jingling just out of reach? That's the sound of success! But only for those willing to grab it!"
"Amen," Oktavi says, nodding.
"Hard to find," Jixxi says dryly, staring at Dampwick.
"I think your personal touch is called for." He nods at Mikzi. "A shock from the battery on your Goblin All-In-1-Der Belts should do the trick."
"Consider me in compliance with your timely suggestion," Mikzi says dryly.
"If a small number of the defiant trolls were to have their attitudes adjusted, the rest would quickly fall into line. Kaja'Cola production must continue or the Trade Prince will have all of our heads!"
"We’ll handle it. Do you know if that All-In-1-Der Belt only works on Troggs, or if it’s usable on goblins too? Asking for a friend," Oktavi asks.
"You heard 'im, girls. Let's motivate some trolls."
"Don’t we have labor laws against that, ma’am?" he asks back, looking at Mikzi.
"The laws of the Glittering Light are higher than the laws of labor," Wikkit offers helpfully.
"Sometimes the laws are a little bendy. Like me," says Mikzi.
Dampwick sighs. “Oh, Wikkit, pray for me…”
Wikkit grins at Mikzi. "Now you're gettin' it, sister!"
"Surely the Glittering Light values flexibility," Jixxi nods.
They move towards the mines.
"Let's get these trolls back to work, teehee!" Oktavi says, striking a pose.
Mikzi happily adjusts a few troll attitudes.
Wikkit zaps a troll, "The Light's work ethic be with you!"
Once the slaves are motivated again, they enter one of the mines.
"Worm time!" Oktavi says, smiling. "I haaaaate worms!"
Mikzi demotivates a few worms.
"Yeah, they're the wormst," Jixxi mumbles.
"Don't ever say something like that in front of me," Oktavi snaps. "… kidding, teehehee!" She is a certified pun hater.
Jixxi follows along, but mostly the worms are dealt with before she gets to them. It's possible she should not have napped during the fighter training seminar.
Mikzi smirks at the interaction between Oktavi and Jixxi, and makes a note in her little book.
"Oh, don't wormy, I worm't," Jixxi says with a straight face.
Mikzi snorts.
Wikkit giggles softly.
"I think that should be enough motivation. Can't get over this day soon enough," Oktavi rolls her eyes.
They go back to Foreman Dampwick.
"The worms have been dealt with! Yay!" Oktavi tells Dampwick.
"I say good riddance to those pests!.. Yay..! What about our slaves?" he inquires.
Wikkit clasps her hands skyward. "Hallelujah! Our pensions be praised!"
"Next time maybe ask us sooner," says Mikzi. "I'm going to be forced to make extensive notations about your inefficiency, unless there's some reason I maybe shouldn't."
"Please no, I've got a family to feed!" Dampwick is famously a single orphan with no children.
Mikzi extends her hand. "Unless there's some reason I maybe shouldn't," she says a bit louder.
Dampwick whimpers.
"Anyway, for the slave, the issue has been resolved too!" Oktavi beams.
"Surely, I can offer a blessing to ensure your prosperity, Foreman. Eh…have you tithed recently?" Wikkit bats her eyes.
"Right!" He hands Wikkit two coins. "Twice as much as last week!"
"A- anyway! I couldn't have done it better myself. In fact, I didn't," he says.
"Oh her he pays," Mikzi says menacingly.
Wikkit beams at Dampwick, clasping the coins to her bosom. "Blessings upon your profits, Foreman."
"I guess somebody trusts his Glittering Light," Jixxi mutters.
"You're an inspiration to us all. I'm sure that in no time at all we'll all be talking about the great and powerful, and may I add extremely wealthy, Trade Princess that one of you’ll make!" He exclaims. "Probably you, HR lady. You're scary enough."
Mikzi grins, somewhat mollified by the flattery.
Wikkit winks at Mikzi.
"Speaking of inspiration, Sassy has been riding me to supply some Kaja'Cola for the party that's being thrown in your honor in a few days," he blurts out.
"Nice." Mikzi folds her arms.
"A party? For us? Awwwww!" Oktavi claps for the group.
"Oops, was it supposed to be a surprise? You didn't hear it from me."
"Anyhow, with production down these last few days, this is all I managed to get made. Would you take it to her?" he asks.
"I'm all for pretending to be surprised at a party in my honor," Jixxi says, cheering up.
Oktavi waves goodbye to the foreman, and then goes to meet Sassy.
"Yo, Sass. We took care of it," says Mikzi.
"And here's a gift from Dampwick!" Oktavi hands her a box.
Sassy eyes the six-pack warily, as if she expects it to explode as soon as you hand it to her.
"Don't think he's got explosions in him," Jixxi says reassuringly. "Given his wick problem."
Opening the box, Sassy gasps. “We need more Kaja'Cola than this!”
"I swear I'm going to fire Dampwick if I don't kill him first!"
Mikzi snorts.
Oktavi laughs out loud. "Bwahahaha!"
Oktavi clears her throat. "Sorry about that~!"
"Just so you know, you'll find Kaja'Cola all over town. It's the Bilgewater Cartel's best-selling product of all time! We need some more," Sassy says, coming up with ways to get more.
"Just remember, image is everything if we're going to get one of you the position of Trade Princess! No, wait, profits are everything! Explosions are a close second! Then, image!"
Mikzi sighs.
Jixxi nods. Sound priorities.
Sassy whispers to herself. “He'll get me more later? How are we supposed to get them promoted to Trade Princess without our number one product on the shelves?!!!”
“Oh, by the way, while you were down at the mines, Megs in marketing was asking for you all," Sassy adds. "I think she's got something for you!"
"That could mean a lotta things," Mikzi says.
"Megs in marketing?" Oktavi asks.
"Yes, Megs Dreadshredder, in marketing. Anyway, something about your new rides?" Sassy answers. "She's right outside the building to the left."
"Ooh! New rides?" Jixxi brightens.
"Our new rides?" Oktavi claps happily. "Yay!"
Oktavi runs to Megs in marketing.
Megs looks at her excitedly. "Aaah, you’re here! So very good to see you." She greets everyone, once they join them too. “To see you all!”
"I hope that you are enjoying the Kaja'Cola marketing campaign. We're planning a massive set of explosions for the next phase of the campaign. That always goes over well with our target demographic."
Wikkit greets Megs with the usual cupped hands 'prayer' gesture.
"Oh, sorry, High Investor, I'm non-denominational," Megs says, not really sure of what that means, but it's worth a shot.
Wikkit gives Megs a look of Disappointment, but says, "Of course, I understand."
Megs is definitely adding 'I'm non-denominational' in her vocabulary from now on. She's won.
"Sup Megs," says Mikzi.
"Yeah, explosions are pretty much the best," Jixxi agrees. "Kapow! Boom! And then gold."
Wikkit preaches: "And lo, the prophet did make explosions, that his profits would explode!"
"Most importantly, you’re here for the rides right? Oooooh, I think you’re going to like this!" Megs in marketing says excitedly.
Oktavi jumps up and down excitedly. "Gimme gimme gimme gimme!!"
Mikzi examines her nails. Whatever.
Jixxi rocks onto the balls of her feet. She's not jumping up and down. Barely.
Megs in marketing hands them all the keys to their new rides. "Here, girls! Enjoy!" Megs in marketing turns to Mikzi. "By the way, I love your hair! What do you think of my dye?" Her hair is the exact same color and style as Mikzi. She also wears the same earrings.
"I think you're a woman of excellent taste," Mikzi says flatly.
Megs in marketing smiles proudly. Oktavi is already leaving with the keys in her hands for the parking. She is driving that car now.