(2025-02-23) Horror

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Author:	Saaron
Summary:	Back in Northrend, Iphindra asked Mordecai for help with emotional problems, which she thinks she can solve with Scourge crystals that can bring horror, despair, and suffering. Fun!
Rating:	M for Mature 17+

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Vision of horror and death, suffocation, panic

Iphindra is pacing up and down her rented room in Dalaran, her loose green shirt showing all the plants growing along her arms. After all, she did send a rather risky letter!

"Mordecai, I am Iphindra.
Greetings, Mordecai! I hope you are okay with me sending you a letter?
This is the first letter I have sent, I’m sorry if I write the content correctly. I’m trying!
Could you join me in my room, in Dalaran, tomorrow evening? I need to show you something. It’s very personal, and I think it’s better if we keep this a secret. Please!
I really like you, so that’s why I chose to ask you and not someone else. I hope to see you there!
If not, see you soon anyway!"

That's what Mordecai received in his mailbox, with the letter revealing the druid's address as well.

And now, Iphindra waits clutching the side of her brown pants, hoping that he'll come. The crystal shards she stole from the Scourge lay on the table, next to her bed.

Mordecai consults his pocket watch, trying to determine if it's late enough to qualify as evening. He checks the address of Iphindra's room - correct. He smooths out his blue and gold priest robe, tries to fix his hair, and finally knocks. He has been standing in the hall for long enough, apparently.

Iphindra runs and opens the door so fast it's as if she'd been waiting on the other side this entire time. "Greetings, Mordecai! C- Come in! Thank you for coming…" She steps to the side of the door and out of his way to let him in.

"Oh!" Mordecai slips inside the room quickly. "Hello, Iphindra."

She closes the door behind him. "You're probably wond- wondering why I brought you here… I need your help with so- something, but I need you to keep this a secret." Vines wrap gently around Iphindra's arms in a soothing way.

Mordecai nods. "All right. I'm good at keeping secrets. What is it that you need help with…?"

"He-here, come take a look," Iphindra walks onto her bed to reach the other side. There was no need to, she could have just walked around it. She points at the bedside table, on top of which are three purple crystals. "Those are shards of crystals from the Sc- Scourge. They make you feel horror, suffering and d-d-despair. I took them, during one of our squad missions…"

Mordecai breaks into a big smile as she climbs over the bed. (He goes around; he has shoes on.) His smile fades as she explains the crystals. "They what? How do they work? If you touch them…?"

"I think it's by touch," Iphindra nods. "I'm not su- sure ! And I think they're not supplied with magical en-energy anymore, so the- they're harmless. I would like t- to infuse them with it again…"

Mordecai stares at her. "…Why?"

"It's… also a secret. Kind of. The captain knows!" Iphindra takes a deep breath. "My sisters a- asked that I don't speak too much about it, but I was rai- raised among dryads. And I became like th- like them." She smiles shyly at Mordecai. "Strong negative emotions like sadness or anger, the- they make me hurt. And if they're too strong my life becomes at risk." She points at the crystals, a little excitedly. "B- but if I experience them with a priest a- around to keep me safe, maybe I can learn to withstand them better! I think these shards m- may be the poison I need to make the antidote!"

"Your life becomes at risk?" Mordecai looks at her wide-eyed. "I don't know too much about dryads, but… when you say they make you hurt, what does that mean? Physical pain? Emotional pain?"

Iphindra looks up at the ceiling, considering how to explain it. "I don't really… Feel pain, b- but these emotions take my life force… It's like…" Her hand moves under her hair and scratches the back of her neck. "Exhaustion… B- but more instantaneous…" She sighs. "Thanks to the plants around me, I'm okay most of the time. They give their own energy f- for me if that happens, but they unfortunately wither and die… But with some very, very strong feelings, they might not be enough!"

"This seems incredibly dangerous for you to try, then. I'm not sure if I would recommend this." Mordecai frowns at the shards. "Feeling certain emotions being dangerous for your health is… very alarming. Is this change something you ultimately want to revert?"

Iphindra stares at Mordecai, a little saddened that he wasn't on board with this extremely dangerous idea immediately. "I'm not su- sure I want this to go away completely. I think this is part of my magic, so- somehow. But I… I want to control this better… But I don't know how. I don't understand these other emotions…" She gulps slightly, her lower lip quivering slightly. Oops, that's one leaf wilting and falling from her hair.

Mordecai sits down on the edge of the bed. "Why don't we talk about this for a bit, then?" He smiles a little at her, his voice calm and reassuring. "Part of my job as a chaplain is understanding emotions, so maybe I can help you. Do you have trouble identifying the emotions that you're feeling?"

Iphindra nods. "I know when I feel amused, happy, joy, even overjoyed, and those make me stronger! I know… sad. It's when everything feels heavy - my shoulders, my ears, my heart pull me towards the ground…" She looks up, thinking about the rest of the list. "I… feel… solid, when I'm around someone I don't want to be around!" she puts her hands on her shoulders that she holds up. "My shoulders are solid, my legs and fists too! And also my eyebrows!" She furrows her brows. "I… don't know what that is, though…"

Mordecai considers the description. "That feeling might be 'tense'. Like… your body is getting ready just in case there's trouble. Do you ever feel that same way before a fight that you aren't sure you can win? It's about anticipating that something bad might be about to happen."

"Yes! Tense…" She repeats the word, trying to commit it to memory. "Tense. Tha- that's it. What should I do i- if I feel tense?" She looks at the shards. "And what about horror, suffering, and despair? H- how do I know what those are like?"

Mordecai smiles at her. "Let's talk about one at a time, all right? When you feel tense… you should think about whether or not your body is giving you an important warning about something that could actually be a threat. It isn't always. Sometimes you might feel tense because you're nervous about whether something will go well or poorly, like being introduced to a new person and not knowing how they're going to treat you. When I feel tense, I think, 'Am I in danger or am I just nervous?' and act accordingly. If I'm in danger, I might take steps to protect myself, like watching for trouble or getting to a safer location. If I'm just nervous, I might try to take deep breaths to calm myself down."

Iphindra tilts her head as she listens to him. "So, taking d- deep breaths… Helps?" She tries to take a deep breath, seeing if she feels something particular about it. "Does it help with sad t- too?"

"Here, try this. Breathe in through your nose, hold it…" He waits for a few seconds. "…and then out through your mouth. In… and out. The breathing helps calm your body's natural stress response by slowing your heart rate down a little and giving you something repetitive to focus on." He smiles a little wryly. "It might not help with sadness, but sometimes it helps with fear."

Iphindra follows his instructions. She breathes in through her nose, holds it, waits for a few seconds, and then lets it all through her mouth. She repeats the instructions twice or thrice. "Like when an animal's breathing slows down as it realizes you're not a threat!" she exclaims. "I get it. I'll try, next time I feel fear." She looks at the crystal shards.

"Yes, it's just like that," Mordecai agrees, encouraging. "Now… you know what sadness is. Despair is the feeling of wanting to give up, of feeling like there's no way things can possibly succeed. It's the opposite of hope. The moment when a prey animal realizes it absolutely cannot outrun its predator, and it's going to get eaten no matter what. But it's just a feeling. Often, people will feel despair when there is actually still hope. You might be able to recognize it as sadness but worse."

"Hmm, so that's… despair," Iphindra looks at the ground. "I think I felt despair, once. It was… when we were all having nightmares."

Mordecai hums sympathetically. "And if you recognize despair as sadness magnified to a greater extent, you can recognize horror the same way, as extreme fear. Seeing something horrible might also make you feel disgust or revulsion. Sometimes when I look at the Scourge's abominations, I feel horror - I think things like 'I don't want that to happen to me,' and 'They didn't deserve that happening to them.'"

"O- okay, that makes sense. Emotions…" Iphindra pauses, gently putting one of the roots in her hair behind her ear. "They can be bigger, or smaller, and that gives them a- a new identity." She frowns slightly, thinking about this. "What should you do, then, when these identities are strong?" She then looks back up at Mordecai. "A- also, I don't know what disgust or revulsion is…"

"Have you ever eaten a food you didn't like?" Mordecai asks. "Something that tasted really bad, maybe?"

Iphindra stares at him, a little worriedly. "No," she says, wondering if she should have. Should she go find something that tastes really bad to eat right now? "B- but I wouldn't like to eat animals, i- if that helps!" She hopes that helps him make his point. Iphi is trying her best to be a good student, right now!

"Oh, you're lucky," Mordecai says, smiling at her. "Hmm… maybe imagine eating a rotten fruit, knowing that it isn't healthy and it's going to make you sick when you eat it, but you have to eat it anyway."

Iphindra nods slowly. Why would she eat a rotten fruit when she could just grow new ones and leave that one to animals who can handle rotten fruits is beyond her. "What then?"

"Hmm…" Mordecai tilts his head. "I don't know if this is the best example, but I would find the idea of eating that very unpleasant. I wouldn't want to make myself sick. My stomach might feel strange at the thought, like I might be about to vomit. That's disgust. Revulsion is that but stronger."

"Hmmm," Iphindra tilts her head. "I think I see. I don't know if I've… Encountered that yet." She shrugs a little. "Maybe because what I eat is pretty similar to what I used to eat back home… ? Disgust is about food, right?"

"Not just food. It could be about anything you find really unpleasant, like… some people are disgusted by blood, or slime, or…"

All natural things, Iphindra thinks. Not anything she finds particularly bad, yet. "Or?.." she insists.

"Or people behaving in a way that is very rude and unpleasant, perhaps," Mordecai says, shrugging. "I wouldn't be too eager to experience it, honestly."

Iphindra nods. "I- I think it makes me sad and… Tense, when people argue," she smiles at him. "But I will try to see if disgust too!'

Mordecai looks once more at the crystals. "I feel like… you might not have enough plants in here with you for any of these. And I don't think I'd recommend activating them. But if you really wanted to try one, it should probably be the horror one. I could create a ward against fear to cut off the effect." He bites his lip. "I don't know how powerful the magic is, or the range. What if it frightens everybody else in the inn, too?"

Iphindra turns to look at the crystals. "I… I don't know, I didn't think it could go far. It is just the shard, right? It won't be as strong as the crystal?" She shakes her head. "I should have asked the death knights…"

"I have no idea," Mordecai says honestly. "Um, as for suffering… do you feel pain when you get hurt?"

"I do!" Iphindra says. "I got in danger once or twice during the squad missions…" She gently runs her fingers through plants in her hair. They were there to protect her!

"Suffering is… pain that lasts a long time, that you can't ignore. It could be physical pain or emotional pain."

Iphindra perks up. This sounds familiar, but extremely nebulous, as if she'd felt that emotion in a past life. "Like something you have to carry e-everywhere? All the time? A heavy… Feeling?"

Mordecai considers this and nods slowly. "Yes. I don't know if it always feels… heavy, but you can't forget about it easily while it's happening."

"I think I know that one! I don't know from where, though…" The elf tilts her head. "Probably."

"I still… wouldn't recommend activating any of those shards." Mordecai bites his lip. "But if you really want to try it… I can ward you a few seconds after you activate the horror one. If you're sure you have enough plants."

One of the plants in her hair slithers towards the bedside table, wraps around one of the crystals, the horror one, bringing it to Iphindra's side. She pauses, staring deep into the dark crystal. "We can put… Just a tiny little bit of magic inside of it." She looks up at Mordecai. "Just a bit."

"This still feels very dangerous to me," Mordecai says. "Are you sure this is worth it?"

Iphindra looks away, her gaze lost in thought. Her face softens into a more relaxed expression as she sees her Cobalt Company tabard. "If I want to be able to stay with Cobalt Company… I- I need to survive feeling horror."

"Have you felt fear before? Regular fear?" Mordecai checks. "Feeling like you are the prey animal and you're in danger?"

"Fear of not… Of people thinking I am not good enough," Iphindra nods, kind of missing the point of the question. "And also in the nightmare like everybody had."

Mordecai shivers at the mention of the Nightmare. "All right. So if you activate the shard and me putting the Fear Ward on you and trying to dispel the magic somehow doesn't break the effect, and you go unconscious, what would you like me to do?"

"Heal me. I know you are very good with healing," Iphindra smiles. The heartbeat does grow faster at the talk, even if she tries to suppress the sensation. "I trust you can save me if anything goes wrong."

Mordecai looks warily at the plants growing around Iphindra's arms. "If you're determined to go through with this… all right. Just this crystal. Because I know that I can ward against Fear."

Iphindra jumps to her feet, plants carrying the crystal shard to her side. "Okay, I am ready, le-let us try this." Green light glow around Iphindra's hands. "Are you ready too?"

"Light, guard us against Shadow," Mordecai prays quietly. He rises to his feet as well. "I'm ready."

Iphindra nods. Vines swirl around the crystal, bringing it up to her chest. The green glow enveloping her hands merge as they gather close to the shard. She takes a deep breath, filling the crystal with nature magic. She takes another look at Mordecai for confirmation that it'll all be fine.

Mordecai is watching her, one hand raised. He looks ready to catch her if she falls over. It might not be the most reassuring look, but he's got her back.

Iphindra closes her eyes, reassured. She wraps her hands around the crystal and, for a little bit. Everything is quiet. Calm. She sees her home forest of Ashenvale, with her sisters doing their daily activities all around. As if she wasn't even there.

"Iphindra?" Mordecai checks in after a few seconds. "Is it working?"

Iphindra remains silent, invisible to the people in that imaginary world yet also not quite in Azeroth either. The forest is calm, colorful, and sweetly scented.

That is, until dust begins to levitate off of the woodland's ground. Ashes fly. Dryads begin to cough, poisoned by the smoke rising all around them. Fire begins spreading from deep inside the earth. Bursts of flames break through the ground, turning into pillars reaching for the canopy, leaves turning into a rain of fire. The dryads fall, waking up as undead creatures, powered by the fire that killed them. Iphindra attempts to help, but all fails. No plants answer her cry for help, no animals fly in to rescue them. Everything abruptly dies, screams pierce through Iphindra's ears. Iphindra watches this cataclysm, the feeling of helplessness growing all through her. She screams, and screams, and screams, her lungs filling with the ashes. Tears roll down her face for Mordecai to see, and plants wither all around her at an alarming rate. She shivers, her ears raise up to the sky in alert, and her skin feels so, so cold. Her heart pounds through her chest. That is horror. Iphindra is feeling horror.

Mordecai is ready. The moment the plants begin to die, he traces the symbol of the Fear Ward over Iphindra's heart, Light following his fingertip. It is a quick gesture, done in less than a second.

The Light of the Fear Ward burns through the magic of the Scourge. It feels like safety itself, whatever safety feels like to Iphindra.

"Drop it," Mordecai says, and aims a crackling Dispel Magic at the crystal in Iphindra's hands.

Iphindra watches as the dream disappears. The columns of fire evaporate. Fire vanishes from the dryads' veins, and soon after, they disappear too. The fear quickly, but not entirely, leaves her. The whole imaginary world gone, Iphindra comes back to her body, the crystal shattered even more on the floor beside her. She falls to her knees, taking a deep, raggedy breath.

"I feel… I- I… I felt horror…"

Mordecai crouches down carefully, taking a pair of tweezers from within a first-aid kit inside his bag. He begins collecting the fragments of shattered crystal without touching them, putting them in a small bag. "It's over now. You're safe." His voice is calm and steady.

"Horror exists in my mind because I have s- so much to lose," Iphindra attempts to throw her arms around Mordecai as he crouches down, looking for physical comfort, more than magical. "It's a- a reminder of my mind that I li- live."

Mordecai carefully puts his left arm around her and pats her back gently. "Had you ever felt it before…?"

"I don't… know," Iphindra says, shaking her head. "I-I-I… I don't know"

"All right," Mordecai murmurs, soothing. "All right. Just breathe."

Iphindra holds on tighter to Mordecai's shirt. The plants still alive around her gently tighten around her own arms, reaching for Mordecai as if to protect him as well from this unknown threat. She takes a deep breath. Then another. Then another, following Mordecai's previous instructions about nervousness.

She knows horror, and horror is terrifying yet so important.

"Count to four in your head as you breathe," Mordecai tells her. "Inhale for four, hold for four, exhale for four, hold for four."

Iphindra proceeds to obey. Except that she counts to four very quickly. 1234, 1234, 1234, 12…3…4, 1… 2… 3… 4… Her breathing slows down as the numbers start rolling a little slower than before each time.

Mordecai, close enough to track her breathing, notices this quickly and begins to count out loud at a steady pace for her.

Iphindra reaches a regular, calm breathing pattern, slowly getting a hold of her emotions. "I don't want to try the other cry-crystals anymore," she whispers.

"Then you won't," Mordecai says. Surprise! It's that simple. He finishes collecting the pieces that he can see.

Iphindra nods. She sits back a little away from Mordecai for a second. "Thank you, Mordecai…"

Mordecai wipes the tweezers with a cloth before putting them back in his first-aid kit. "I'll get rid of this," he says, raising the bag of crystal fragments. "Put the others in here?"

Plants move to reach for the remaining fragments and put them gently in the bag, carefully so as to not touch either Iphindra or Mordecai. "Th- thank you," she says to the plants this time.

Mordecai closes the bag up. "Oh, um, thank you," he says to the plants as well. If Iphindra can thank the plants, so can he.

Iphindra tries to give Mordecai a small smile, but barely. A lot of the plants in her hair are brown now, deprived of all life. She sits on her knees her shoulders low.

Mordecai gives her a minute and then suggests, "Dalaran has some gardens. Would you feel better out there?"

Iphindra nods in silence, before looking up at him with sad doe eyes.

Mordecai rises and offers her a hand up. "I'll come with you if you'd like."

"Thank you, Mordecai," Iphindra says, taking his hand, a weak smile appearing across her face. "You are truly a friend." No stuttering this time.

Mordecai helps her to her feet, smiling shyly. "You're welcome."