(2023-12-07) Nurture Your Spark, Erixa

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Author:	Luridel
Summary:	Tanet considers approaching the Argent Crusade. Erixa finds her first and discovers what has become of one of her old teachers. ~1200 words.
Rating:	T for Teen

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chronic pain, contains death knight, discussion of the Hunger

Vindicator Erixa rides through the eerie arcane forest of Crystalsong on the back of her trusty charger, Righteous, humming a little under her breath to keep the horse from getting too agitated. It's certainly for Rye's benefit, not hers, she's fine. Soon enough she'll need to head back to the Storm Peaks, but for the moment she's checking in where checking in is needed. At the paladin support group in Light's Trust, and now at the training grounds where the Argent Crusade and the Ebon Blade are taking baby steps into working together.

She keeps up the humming, an old hoptrot song she's been fond of since she was a girl, as she slows on the approach to the encampment, now fairly established for all that the people still live in tents. The living and the dead, all working together. She glances around as she rides through, keeping open eyes for anyone she might know of either persuasion. Is Icaros here, or is he still picking flowers in Azshara?

Standing at a little bit of a distance from the training grounds is a draenei wearing saronite armor with no helm. In front of her forehead, the symbol of the Naaru burns with a cold blue light.

Erixa pauses when her gaze fixes on the draenei, and the song dies in her throat. There's surprise in her expression, and also a touch of dread. She dismounts, giving Rye a comforting pat on the neck, and then walks resolutely over towards the other draenei woman.

"Teac…" Erixa doesn't finish the word 'teacher' in draenei, pausing and then amending to, "Tanet? Is that you?"

"That is my name." Tanet turns. Her skin is a paler blue than it used to be, and her eyes shine with that same cold blue light. "…Erixa?" Her voice sounds pained. "Why are you here? Have you joined the Argent Crusade?"

"No, I…" Erixa takes another hesitant step towards her. "I joined a mercenary company? It's a good one, though, they do good things. And we all work together, with the Argent Crusade, with…" she can't seem to hold back anymore and blurts out, "What happened to you?"

"I went to the Plaguelands, to offer my support as a healer to the Argent Dawn. I volunteered for… does it matter, now? I believe you can fill in the rest." Tanet reaches up towards her forehead. "I died calling the gift of the Naaru, and the Light… stayed, when I was raised."

Erixa blinks. "It stayed? Does it hurt?"

"Constantly," Tanet says, and she sounds so, so tired. "But by now… perhaps a little less than it did when I was first raised. Or perhaps this is wishful thinking, that one day I may not have to suffer so. My healing abilities have been greatly diminished. And it is… risky for me to be around others of the Ebon Blade, especially if the Hunger is strong in them at that moment."

Erixa steps slightly closer to Tanet, still wary. "I have been told only touching the Light is agony for your… for people like you are now. It must be burning you inside out. Have you thought to visit O'ros? Surely they would take their gift back, it is not for torture."

Tanet lowers her eyes. "I do not wish to lose the Light for good, Erixa. This is… what remains of my old self. The Lich King could not fully take the Light from me. I have become a monster, but the Light is still there. I believe it worth the cost. I think it is what has helped me… hold on to scraps of who I used to be."

"If all that is left is torture, maybe it is time to move forward," Erixa shakes her head. "What if you come to hate it, for all the pain? Or what if it kills… what if it just slowly destroys you?"

Tanet takes a deep breath and exhales slowly - something that generally takes conscious effort, from a Death Knight who no longer needs to breathe. "It is pain, constant pain. Perhaps it is not the full measure of agony that I might experience were someone to use the Light on me. I do not know. There are those who live full lives with chronic pain. I cannot call this a full life, but… Prophet Velen said this was to be our last world. I cannot abandon it yet, Erixa."

"I should not try to tell my own teacher what to do," Erixa says, raising her hands helplessly. "Just.. have you others of our people to speak with about this? Icaros?"

"I have not approached him, though I have seen him," Tanet admits. "I fear it may be… difficult for others of the Ebon Blade to be near me. My pain is persistent."

"So you are cast out by even the castouts," Erixa says, sympathy in her voice. "I am sorry this has happened to you, teacher. What will you do? Where will you go?"

"Thank you for your kindness, Erixa. This world must be protected. It has always been my hope to stand at that final battle against the Legion and ensure a world safe from their influence for our children to grow. But until that day comes, there are other threats, other battles." Tanet rests her hands on the hilts of her two runeblades. "I am learning to live with the pain. These are good people, the Argent Crusade, but I do not know that they would accept me among their ranks now. Still, I hope to offer what aid I can, teaching them about what the Lich King has made us capable of. You see me now at my most stable, Erixa. It is not always so."

Erixa nods. "So I have heard. Are you… safe to have, on a battlefield?"

"Perhaps there is nowhere safer for me," Tanet admits. "I can tell my enemies from my allies, that is no difficulty."

Erixa sighs. "I have been trying to find in my heart to treat the death knights as allies, as the Argent Crusade suggests. I know they all suffer, but… maybe it is easier when I see people I know." Erixa shakes her head. "But then in the same way it is much less easy. Why is this done to our people, after all else? The Legion, so many worlds, the orcs… why does it seem that everything in this universe seeks for our people to suffer?"

"If you measure your misfortunes without your blessings, the scales will always come up short." There's just a trace of the old warmth in her tone. "Nurture your spark, Erixa. You will outlive this shell." Tanet gestures at herself.

Erixa smiles sadly, glancing away like she might pretend it is the old Tanet speaking, saying such familiar things. But then she turns back to the current Tanet and sighs. "At least, we are allies now. If I cannot offer you a place anywhere, I can at least say I will not feed on your pain, teacher. Nor will I hurt you further, nor permit you to hurt me. If you ever need… to talk… or just to be not alone."

"Thank you, Erixa." Tanet bows her head. "I am truly grateful."