(2023-11-14) Patterns of Mistakes

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Author:	Alli
Summary:	Aiseia and Erixa meet up in Dalaran and discuss such topics as their latest adventures in Storm Peaks, the current situation with the Horde and Alliance, and patterns they see in themselves.
Rating:	T for Teen

Arc: Season 12

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self-analysis, discussion of self-sacrifice, discussion of atrocities committed by orcs and Forsaken

Erixa wanders into the beer garden and raises a hand in greeting when she sees Ace.
[Aiseia]: Hello!
[Erixa]: Hi, Ace! Keeping warm since the mountains? *Erixa slides onto the bench across from her.*
[Aiseia]: Oh, I have been. As long as you keep moving it's not so bad. It's too early to know for sure, but how are you finding the Storm Peaks?
[Erixa]: Hmm… some of the goblins I like better than others. There are unusual things there too… we ran into these blue vrykul women. Unfortunately, they were not improved by blueness.
Erixa gestures to herself, clearly improved by blueness.
[Aiseia]: Oh, blue vyrkuls? Sounds like the name of a tavern.
Erixa chuckles. "I think you're right. And like tavern, they sometimes steal men away."
[Aiseia]: Oh, really?
Erixa nods. "We had to rescue the men goblins. I have no idea why they do such a thing."
[Aiseia]: I — huh! No, I can't think why either.
[Erixa]: No stolen men in your missions, then? How did you find the Storm Peaks so far?
[Aiseia]: We are retrieving parts for a goblin engineer. I'll let you imagine that for a moment.
Erixa winces. "Do they explode on you?"
[Aiseia]: She left her toolbox in the middle of a minefield.
[Erixa]: Oh! We saw a minefield… you went into it? *Erixa raises an eyebrow.*
[Aiseia]: And we couldn't just fly in and get it because there were turrets. So we had to use divine shield and bet wisely.
[Erixa]: Turrets. *Erixa raises the other eyebrow.* These goblins ask a lot of you. I hope everyone got through safe?
[Aiseia]: Oh, yeah. We're a canny lot. After that, it was shaking down Gnolls.
[Erixa]: Ah, we too fought some Gnolls. They have been stealing food. *Erixa considers* Dane thinks they should be called Sgnolls.
[Aiseia]: Ha! To go with snowbolds?
[Aiseia]: I agree, just because it's funny.
Erixa chuckles. "Yes, to go with."
[Erixa]: Some of the goblins are a bit like the officers in Fjord, not caring about their people. But not all… I think maybe Ricket is decent.
[Aiseia]: Ricket was the one who wanted us to get her toolbox.
Erixa blinks. "So on one hand, she cares for lost, poisoned goblin named Zeek. On the other hand she sends Cobalt into minefield with turrets."
Erixa shakes her head, exasperated. Goblins.
[Aiseia]: Yeah, that's definitely goblins. Sometimes if you think about the reasons too hard, it just unravels.
[Erixa]: Well, I hope it is worth it. That they like the Alliance, that we get titan artifacts…
[Aiseia]: Or at least, that we got there first.
Erixa nods. "Or that. That titan artifacts are ours."
Erixa peers at Ace more closely, leaning forward a little. "Does it help, do you think? Keeping busy in Storm Peaks."
[Aiseia]: I—yes. Staying busy helps. And being in the squad helps.
[Aiseia]: Especially that. Because others need me, but it's all right if I need them.
Erixa smiles, leaning one arm on the table. "I am glad to hear. And the team, it is a good team?"
[Aiseia]: Well I'm with Ben. and Brannagen is there, I knew him from the early days when i was just getting started with the company. and Auralind, she was there when I interviewed. Oranna I just met, but I like her.
[Aiseia]: I think we'll do well.
[Erixa]: Ah, that is good. Almost all people you have known. *Erixa smiles.* My team is most new, but still good. I have Dane and Velrin I ran into from time to time. Cressidha and Iphindra are new to me. I do not think I know Oranna. Or… I think… she was assistant before, doing paperwork.
[Aiseia]: I've met both of them! Cressidha more often. She is a lady, did you know that?
[Aiseia]: But there she was, trampling the moss in Grizzly Hills.
Erixa grins. "Cressidha of House Aspenwood Lady, yes, she introduced herself so. But yes, no complaints at going into spider-infested caves."
[Aiseia]: Her brother too, just march right in there. I think he's on a different assignment now?
[Aiseia]: Anyway, I like them. And Dane Atley, too.
Erixa perks up at that. "Colson Paladin? Where did he go? I used to talk with him sometimes, learning about Azeroth Light."
[Aiseia]: I'm not sure but if I had to guess, the Argent Crusade needed him. Maybe? It's a guess.
Erixa considers that. "Maybe I should ask. He did not come to our paladin gathering. Maybe he needs… support? I am not always good at seeing this in time." She casts a faintly guilty look at Ace.
[Aiseia]: I bet I could ask. He found out I'm gem-cutting and he sent me a specimen. A nice one! I'm waiting to cut it, it's too nice.
[Erixa]: Oh? What kind of gem? Northrend gem?
[Aiseia]: Yes. It's very pretty. A lovely deep blue!
[Erixa]: That sounds lovely… and I do not remember if I knew you cut gems. Do you make jewelry now?
[Aiseia]: I do! I can. I've been learning gem cutting.
[Erixa]: Hm… I collect metals sometimes, but I do not make anything with them. If they would be helpful, would you like? I can send.
[Aiseia]: If you have a little cobalt? I'd appreciate it. I'm running a bit low.
[Erixa]: I will keep my eyes sharp.
[Aiseia]: Thank you! I saw ore when we were out there, but I felt like I couldn't run off and mine it.
Erixa nods. "Being with a team is good, but means you can't just go your own path. I hope we will get to know our people well. I don't know how it goes usually on a squad. Do people become friends? Or just cold and professional?"
[Aiseia]: Out in the field, it's professional. But…
[Erixa]: But?
[Aiseia]: We had a moment out in the howling fjord that was trouble. People wanted to talk it out.
[Erixa]: A moment… something disturbing happen?
[Aiseia]: Oh yeah! Our first run in with Saronite.
[Aiseia]: Very loud saronite. It's better now. Damper.
[Erixa]: We collected saronite in the cave! It was… not loud. Now I consider, people mentioned that, it talking to you. Maybe something we did? Or maybe it is just different ore, different strength.
[Aiseia]: I think that particular seam is different.
[Erixa]: It could be…
[Aiseia]: But it was disturbing! It was saying things like "you can't trust your friends, they actually don't like you, and the only way you'll be safe is if you kill them."
[Aiseia]: Cheerful stuff!
Erixa 's eyes widen. "Trying to turn you against each other."
[Erixa]: Did not work, clearly, but… makes one think. The Forsaken, their betrayal…
[Aiseia]: Yeah.
[Aiseia]: I don't think saronite alone did it. I think that…I think Sylvanas Windrunner was telling the truth. This was a faction takeover attempt, and she had no idea.
[Aiseia]: It doesn't excuse her. She should have known it was coming. poor intelligence means her people don't like her.
Erixa sighs. "Yes. I wish it had failed before it struck our people, too."
[Aiseia]: I agree.
[Erixa]: Then we would not be at brink of war with the Horde. Not that I want to be friends with Horde, but we could both at least fight the right enemy.
[Aiseia]: I think I have a good guess what happened and why, but it sure doesn't make me feel understanding. You know?
[Aiseia]: A lot of people died because one horde leader was incompetent, and she's still in charge.
[Aiseia]: No. No thanks.
Erixa nods. "I have many, many reasons to distrust the orcs. Now more reasons to distrust Forsaken. The Horde peoples, they make the same mistakes again and again. I would count each grave and put it as a mark against the orcs, but I do not have so much time to count. There are too many. Now, the same with the Forsaken.”
[Aiseia]: I think people have a pattern for the mistakes they make. and for the Alliance, it seems to be running off willy-nilly to go do something heroic.
[Erixa]: Like the King did, after Wrathgate. *Erixa nods slowly, raising one hand to a tentacle in thought.* And wherever the army is now, it is not defending goblins and pushing into Storm Peaks.
[Erixa]: Do you think we have patterns, too? You and I?
[Aiseia]: Hm.
[Aiseia]: I underestimate the risk.
[Erixa]: Of actions?
[Aiseia]: Of enemies.
Erixa considers Ace seriously. "Maybe it is good you see this, and that you work in a team. It balances your pattern."
[Erixa]: I… *Erixa frowns, thinking* Maybe I am too close to myself to see. I am over a thousand I should see myself clearly.
Aiseia shrugs. "It's just this. I call to the light, and it answers. It makes me strong, protects me, purges disease and poison. I vanquish scourge with a word. I knit up wounds with a gesture. It's so much power, and it's never failed me."
[Aiseia]: And it makes me arrogant.
[Erixa]: And you worry one day it might? Or just that it changes who you are?
[Aiseia]: I think that…I can face so much, because the light is with me. But that's not everything I need.
Erixa nods. "It is only one part of a person. It has always been part of me, as long as I can remember. If I lost the Light, I would not be me anymore. But it is not everything."
[Aiseia]: Yes.
[Erixa]: Do you feel you lack something? Something you need?
[Aiseia]: It's just. I have a family, but I don't think they understand me, but the light doesn't ask me to climb the social ladder.
[Aiseia]: It's like that in so many ways. It's that anything that I lack, the light fills it.
[Aiseia]: Do you see?
[Erixa]: But… you want other things to fill it? You want a family that understands?
[Aiseia]: I accept that they don't.
[Erixa]: Do you feel that the Light isolates you?
[Aiseia]: The gem cutting is something I started doing that's new.
Erixa nods. "And it fills something that the Light does not."
[Aiseia]: But yeah. I know I'm alone. But…
Erixa waits patiently, watching Ace.
[Aiseia]: I don't really feel it.
[Aiseia]: And I know, intellectually, that it shouldn't be like that.
[Erixa]: Maybe, if you draw closer to others, you will feel the difference then, even if you do not feel the lack now.
Erixa sighs. "I think I see my pattern, at least of the past few centuries. I do not measure risk to self. It is not an underestimate, it is a lack of care."
[Aiseia]: Maybe. I think that I might. But ooh! That's scary.
[Aiseia]: Lack of care?
Erixa looks at Ace curiously. "Scary? Why? It is just… so many of my people have fallen to violence. If it is a price to pay, I have no right not to pay it. I want to live, of course, but I cannot shrink from that cost."
[Aiseia]: No, I get that. it's just … most people don't have to seriously think about self-sacrifice, you know?
[Erixa]: It is good. Most people should not have to. *Erixa nods*
[Erixa]: But… it occurs to me that maybe it is not the right way to be? That I should value the future more, the good I could do if I do not fall. Prophet Velen speaks always about the future.
[Aiseia]: So I think I get the thing you're saying…you are going through life assuming that you will end in battle, so there isn't anything else to do.
Erixa nods. "It is not a thing I think to avoid. I do not plan for… future peace. I plan for fighting now."
[Aiseia]: Yeah. But what if you could have things that aren't fighting, now?
Erixa looks down at the table. "I do have lovers, sometimes. It is not always fighting. But not… looking toward the future."
Aiseia slaps the table. "It's like you need to buy a house."
Erixa laughs, startled. "Buy a house? Why a house?"
[Aiseia]: Something that you can have now, that you can still have when the future comes, somewhere you can get ready for the future.
[Aiseia]: The future that isn't you ending on a battlefield. But you also have it now.
Erixa chuckles again, looking curiously at Ace, but her expression has gone thoughtful. "A house is maybe less pleasant than a lover, but more permanent. Do you have a house?"
[Aiseia]: …oh Fel. no…
[Aiseia]: I do not have a house.
[Erixa]: It could be a thing you have, in addition to Light? *Erixa grins* But… maybe you are right. It would be a thing to say I plan to return. Where would I buy one? Azeroth is very big.
[Aiseia]: It's very big. And Draenor, too. Oh boy.
[Erixa]: I used to live… well, my past homes are a shipwreck and a place fallen into the Twisting Nether.
[Aiseia]: I like the traditional dwarven homes that are dug into the earth.
[Aiseia]: So I guess that's a consideration.
Erixa nods. "I have not tried such a home. But I once lived next to a mountain. Maybe I will travel, when our squad work is done, and see if there is a place on Azeroth like Talador."
[Aiseia]: It would be something good. Something to spread out your life a little more.
Erixa nods. "A responsibility. Like Righteous, the warhorse. I think it is good advice, my friend. I wish I knew what to give you in return."
[Aiseia]: Honestly, that might be part of it. I've been living in inns and barracks all this time.
[Erixa]: Places that do not feel yours, then. Places impersonal.
[Aiseia]: Yes.
[Erixa]: Maybe if you had a place that was yours, you could… decorate with gems. Whatever you like. Make it reflection of yourself.
[Aiseia]: Yes. Maybe. Maybe I should go back after this mission.
[Aiseia]: Well i could probably run through a portal and go have a peek right now…
Erixa smiles. "It is good they got that sorted out. Maybe me too, I could go look for a place to live, between squad tasks."
[Aiseia]: I’ll want to know what you found.
Erixa nods, still grinning. "I will keep you updated. And maybe we can keep in touch, in case squads diverge?"
[Aiseia]: Yes. I'll hover around here in between times.
[Erixa]: I will come through here then, as well, *Erixa pauses, then adds,* I am not always very attentive, but… you do have my friendship, if you want it. And that is something that is not the Light.
[Aiseia]: Thank you.
[Aiseia]: And you have mine too.
Erixa breathes out, and nods. "I will treasure it. And for now… maybe I will go south, while there are days yet to spend."
[Aiseia]: I mean it. I want to know what you find.
Erixa pushes back from the table and grins. "I will not keep it secret. I promise."