(2022-07-02) A Book Wrapped in Brown Paper

Details

Author:	Mishell
Summary:	A small package arrives for Zeldanna Ambergris.
Rating:	T for Teen

A small rectangular package arrives at the Ambergris estate wrapped in brown paper. Attached to it is an envelope with READ BEFORE OPENING written in bold caps on its outside. Inside the envelope is the following note:

Lady Ambergris,

I've found the first official Cobalt Blade member, a dwarf warrior named Thalstan Stouthammer who will serve as the front man and leader for the group. He's an Ironforge Guard who has been around for a little while by human standards (he's older than I am), but is still quite young and optimistic by dwarven standards. He's courageous, confident, and charismatic, and his father recently died in the war in Silithus, motivating him to achieve great things and carry on the Stouthammer name.

The book I'm sending you is not because I recommend you read it. It's one from my collection that I used to love as a young man, but frankly it's garbage. I'm sending it to you so that you can see the cover. They've changed the hair color to match the character in the book, but the model for that piece of cover art? That's Thalstan. That's our guy. Imagine the hair and beard every bit as dramatic, but jet black. Now imagine that on a poster, surrounded by his loyal and diverse squad. Exciting, right?

I suppose I could have just torn the cover off and sent it, but something in me quails at the idea of doing that to a book, even a trashy one.

Anyway, this is just a taste of what's in store. I'll keep you posted as things develop.

Sincerely,

Lord Elohad Ference

Beneath the brown wrapping is the book that Elohad spoke of: ASSAULT ON SUNSET, by Rosa Knack. It is obviously old and has been read nearly to death — the pages are on the verge of separating from the spine. The slightly tea-stained cover depicts a muscular, rugged dwarf with an axe in each hand, facing off against a massive, salivating orc.

In the background is a magnificent sunset, as well as a magnificent, top-heavy dwarven lass who is in danger of a wardrobe malfunction as she half-swoons at the sight of the Masculine Violence occurring in the foreground.

The book looks genuinely terrible. And is, should Zeldanna dare to crack the pages open. But it is very obvious why a teenage boy would absolutely adore it.